A West Mall resident was recently named a Hero in the Home for her loving and diligent care of her husband, who suffered an acquired brain injury more than 23 years ago.
VHA Home HealthCare (VHA) honoured Etobicoke's Margaret Verdis with this year's Heroes in the Home Award earlier this week at the not-for-profit's Davisville head office. The award recognizes the efforts of family members and friends who "go above and beyond the call of duty to provide a loved one who is disabled, elderly, or chronically ill, with the support needed to live at home.""Margaret is the definition of inspiration. It's truly phenomenal to know that caregivers like her respond to the needs of others with strength, commitment and outstanding dedication on a day-to-day basis," said VHA president and CEO Carol Annett. "The work that caregivers provide is demanding, with lots of challenges and often isn't acknowledged by the outside world."Verdis and her husband Frank, who will celebrate their 50th wedding anniversary in July, first met at their best friends' wedding in Montreal. Their own wedding soon followed, then along came three children. It was a happy life. Then, on the eve of their daughter's wedding in January 1987, everything changed for the Verdis family. Frank, then 56, woke up one morning with a bad headache, which he thought little of at first. But when Verdis came home from work that day, she found her daughter pleading with Frank to go to the hospital. He refused at first, but when the pain hadn't subsided by the next morning, they went to the emergency room. A cat scan revealed an abscess on the left side of his brain, resulting in an Acquired Brain Injury (ABI). Frank was left cognitively and physically debilitated, and spent the next six months in the hospital."After that happened, I didn't know what to do. I didn't know how to make it better," Verdis said. "It was supposed to be a happy time. Family from Greece were coming in for the wedding. Instead, it was very depressing. We were living a different life in the intensive care unit - we closed everything else off."Two operations and six long months later, Frank was deemed ready to go home. Verdis said there were small signs of improvement, but that Frank had changed forever. His neurologist told her that he would continue to make strides socially, but everyday tasks would be a struggle. A professional driver by trade - his career was mostly in transportation, owning and operating both trucks and a taxi business - Frank could no longer drive. For the first time in her life, Verdis, who worked full-time, found herself in need of a driver's licence. She also found herself in need of help at home. Now confined to a wheelchair, Frank requires assistance getting around and often gets confused, thinking he's lost even when he's home. Usually good natured, since his ABI Frank can become aggressive when frustrated. Still, Verdis remains patient and hopeful. Etobicoke Services for Seniors have helped in that regard. Four days a week, from 10 a.m. to 3 p.m., Frank attends ESS's Adult Day Service - giving Verdis the break she needs to do the shopping, housework and other essentials around the house. "My life is similar to a yin-yang - both black and white. It's still mostly good because of the help I have," Verdis said. "That's life now. What else can I do?""This is his home - it's the best thing for him," Verdis added.