I've lived in Greektown for 13 years and in that time I have not learned to speak one word of Greek, which is not a good thing.
But I've tried to make it up by becoming a Greek philosopher. I've done this by hanging out at the Detroit where resident Greek philosopher Alex believes what Socrates said: "An unexamined life is not worth living".
For example, in examining the life of a striking city worker Alex says, "What's with those guys? I work seven days a week, 10 hours a day and I don't get sick days? I get sick. I don't get paid."
On examining the life of a Riverdale realtor;
"These people don't sell. They take orders. There's nothing to sell. I give them five per cent of $500,000 for what? Writing up an order? I work 10 hours a day, for what?"
On examining the life of a Canadian politician;
"Do these people work? I've never seen the guy who represents me. I work 10 hour days, seven days a week. His summer is from May to October. What's with that?"
Of course there are other philosophers at the Detroit;
Chris believes the life of a Toronto Maple Leaf sucks. The Detroit Red Wings on the other hand are Gods, hence the name Detroit.
Demetrios believes a sport you bet on makes life more exciting since some days you win and some days you lose.
George's philosophy is people are essentially dumb and it's your responsibility to take advantage of them. Andoni's philosophy is opposite to Chris's because he comes to the Detroit wearing a Leaf sweater.
Now because the Detroit is a restaurant all these philosophies are jumbled between grilled cheese sandwiches, eggs over easy and the daily special, which is great because philosophizing on an empty stomach will have you believing in Immanuel Kant or some other kind of rubbish.
I'll admit when I first went to the Detroit I didn't really have a philosophy, but over time I acquired the skill of examining people's lives and you know what? I liked it.
Then one day I started examining my wife's life, which is not recommended because according to Alex your wife is exempt. Why?
Well... because wives work on the other aspect of Greek life. The one where you are a mortal and they live on Mount Olympus and mere mortals cannot and should not examine the life of the Gods.